Insult to Injury

Now that the convention is over, I can now share a secret.

I'm... a Republican.

Just kidding. But apparently the GOP thinks I am, because I keep getting mail congratulating me on being such a loyal party member.

Whaaa? Sorry guys, and not to insult my right-wing friends/readers, but there's not a chance in hell. Which is why this latest mailing -- from the office of the office of Senate majority leader Bill Frist -- freaks me out.

Here goes the letter:

Dear Mr. Schneider:

Based on your remarkable support in electing President Bush in 2000, in helping to write history by winning a Republican Senate Majority in 2002 and for years of steadfast support for Republican candidates, I am honored to invite you to become one of only 100 Republicans from California who are being recognized as honorees for the 25th Anniversary of the Inner Circle -- our most elite group of Republican supporters.

The letter came complete with a large, suitable-for-hanging certificate (pictured above) honoring me as a member of the cult..er, "Inner Circle."

Yikes. Maria's now a little concerned that she may have married a Republican... and I'm starting to wonder if I have a doppleganger who's out there picketing stem cell research facilities.